Food blogging guilt

You know what's hilarious?  The other day, I was writing my recipe for this pie when I found myself writing a disclaimer about using canned chickpeas instead of soaking my own.  For starters, I have never soaked chickpeas in my whole life.  Ahh, the dreaded food blogging guilt.

That niggling feeling that we're not good enough, that we should be doing things perfectly, making things from scratch and being amazing at everything.

Afterall, I set up this blog to write and share my food.  I often find myself getting ready to apologise for certain things when I blog.

So I'm saying goodbye to the guilt, and confessing my sins.  Let's face it, they aren't really sins at all, but what make us fabulously human, with all our different beliefs, ideas and shizz like that.


Using shop bought filo/puff pastry
I prefer shop bought pastry to that I make.  It's time consuming and my under-eye bags end up puffier than the end result.  I'm just not very good at it.  I can admit that.  So if I fancy making a pie, or a pretty puff tart thing but I don't fancy spending half my afternoon rolling, kneading, lathering myself in butter & waiting for a mediocre result, then I pop to the corner shop and buy it.  DUH DUH DUH.  If you like doing it yourself then awesome!  I don't.

Using my food mixer to knead dough
When I type that out, it feels like the most ridiculous thing ever, but I once felt guilty for not kneading my own dough by hand.  I don't have any sass to add to that.  It is literally the most benign and stupid thing I have ever felt guilty about.

Writing an opinion
I once casually mentioned in a recipe that I didn't use artificial sweeteners because I don't like the taste.  The next day I received a reply saying I could go and eat shit because I didn't know crap.  Followed by a rant about my misplaced belief in toxins and chemicals (err.. what?) and that even water and kale were made of chemicals.  It ended for me "to enjoy my life of pseudo science and being a shitty wholefood warrior".  Yeah, I literally just do not like artificial sweeteners because they taste rank to me, there's no agenda.  Calm your tits.  So now, Pseudo science and the wholefood warriors is my band name.  Our hits include Chemical Kale & Eat Shit If You Don't Know Crap.

Not knowing who popular chefs / restaurants are
I was at a blogger meet a few months back when everyone starting talking about a restaurant I've never heard of, run by a chef that sounded like  a Disney character.  For five minutes I nodded along, pretending to know what the hell everyone was going on about, laughing in the appropriate places, secretly googling Louie Le Peu (that wasn't his name, but I can't remember it) before giving in and accepting that I'm just not that into this side of food blogging.  I do not keep on top of the culinary news and that's okay, because I have knowledge in other areas.

 This is just on constant repeat in my head if I don't know what's going on.

Liking cheap chain restaurants
Don't get me wrong, I love visiting independent restaurants, tea rooms and cafes.  I love the personality in them, and the food is usually awesome.  You know what else?  I have friends with kids, so a lot of the time, if we're going out for a meal, it will be to somewhere like the Harvester.  It's the same wherever you go and the food is simple, but you can eat there for a fiver and get free salad.  I have just as much fun, but the gasps of amazement are usually because my arms didn't stick to the table rather than the presentation of the food.

Not being able to keep fresh herbs alive
It's a running joke in my crew (I am never saying that again, I'm sorry) that I can keep a house of animals alive and healthy, I have turned my fussy eating husband into a vegetable munching machine, and yet I can't keep a friggin plant alive.  Isn't that supposed to be a step down from animals and husbands?!  The longest I've kept my herbs alive is 2 months and then we had to move out to have work done on the house and the cold / work dust killed them all.  I've read books, I've read blogs.  THE DAMN THINGS WON'T STAY ALIVE.

Being lame at twitter
I'm sorry, I don't get twitter chats.  I like the premise, I want to meet new and interesting bloggers, but I just don't understand this thing.  Who is the host?  Who do you reply too!?  Do you have to search the hashtag and scroll through them all?!  It's been two years and twitter still confuses the hell out of me.  I use it sparingly because I just don't like being on my phone if I'm with people, and I'm usually around people, so I'm rarely on twitter.

Being Messy / not having a pinterest worthy kitchen
My kitchen is not pinterest worthy, it's made to make my life easier.  I make cakes and get batter in my knickers, hand prints on my work surfaces and icing sugar on the ceiling.  I make soup and it ends up on the windows.  Sometimes I look around at the devastation I cause, think of the well lit, shiny pinterest kitchens and die a little inside.  Then I think "I would wreck that beauty in five seconds" and feel pretty happy with my lot.

Writing a story to go with my recipes
This is a blog.  My recipes have stories.  I make salad toppings and talk about fences.  I'll make a pie and tell you about the time Mary berry came to me in a dream and tap danced.  I'll put a paper fez on a chicken and celebrate doctor who.   If you don't like it, don't read it.  End.


  1. One question: How is the soup ending up on windows? I feel like I've been making soup wrong all these years...

  2. YES Emma. All of this. I think ready to roll pastry tastes fine. I never know who famous chefs are or what a lot of fancy/trendy ingredients are (I had my first avocado like 6 weeks ago!). I also suck at decorating cakes because icing is boring and I just want to eat my cake already. Blogging would be boring if we were all the same. I hope. x

    1. Agree completely! I sometimes feel I'm not qualified enough to write about food, but then I think that I love it, and that's enough for me!

  3. I am absolutely with you about store bought pastry. Life is too short to make your own pastry.
    This is a fun post, Emma.

    1. Thanks Angie! Life IS too short to make your own pastry, love that!

  4. I am all for shop bought pastry I even buy short crust sometimes if I am feeling really lazy. I too use my mixer to knead dough.... that is more relaxing time for me. If people want to get all judgy about things... sod them they can always close the browser window ;) I totally agree with everything you have said here :D

    1. Thanks Emma :) Glad it's not just me, it sometimes feels like everyone else is a pastry wizard

  5. Eckkkk - one day I will be brave enough to admit to my sins lol

    For now I will just admit to also having a bomb site of a kitchen. Field Cottage is like one hundred billion years old. And therefore - so is my kitchen! Shes a little grubby, absolutely teeny and just doesnt look cute in photograph.... *cries a lot*

    Oh, but she is in the middle of a field, and usually behaves relatively well. And I get to wander aimlessly around the my gardens fluffy Gus the steers head - So I am over the negatives already #sorrynotsorry

  6. I only ever use shop-bought puff pastry - that was I can concentrate more on yummy things to go IN the pastry!

  7. Oh thank GAWD that someone else admitted out loud that she doesn't get Twitter. We are blogger soul mates. Sometimes this gig can get you down, can't it?

  8. OMG I looooove this because I feel the EXACT same way. Except I am lacking guilt now. Who we are and how we cook evolves. Like a new Doctor Who....


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